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“Focus” 24×12, oil on canvas, $225 Buy Now

I’ve worked on this one on and off for weeks now, sometimes for as little as ten minutes.  It’s darker than most of my paintings.  More monochromatic.  I used the palette knife again, enjoyed piling on the paint in thick layers, amused at the way they rose off the canvas.  I avoided blending too much which is why I probably worked on this one for such short increments.  Whenever the need to overpaint hit me, I moved to something else.  This one was to be spared, its energy to grow instead of deplete as its neared completion.

I’ve written a lot about my love affair with bird paintings, but I keep writing about it because I’m still not quite sure about it.  The heron is becoming my favorite mostly because of the shape of the neck, the bend and turn leading to the direct arrow of a beak that, to me, suggests focus, concentration, vision.

I never thought I’d be okay with this, much less blog about it, but I am officially, finally, and legally divorced.  People keep asking me how I feel and I’ve got no good answer.  I feel exactly as I did the day before it was official.  There are still a few trials ahead, one in particular tomorrow, and if you pray, I’d appreciate you sending a few my way.

There is so much in this world that I cannot control, that I am powerless to influence. Those are the things that used to keep me up at night.  Now I lie in bed thinking of things about which I do have a level of control, the things I can influence.  Painting, strangely has helped me with this.  It offers some semblance of control, direction in an ever changing world.  I put shape, color, form on something that had previously none.  It’s enough to keep a crazy person sane.  At least for the moment.

 

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